Bad Boys of the 1960s

When you live in a town like Portland taht doesn't have a MLB team, you don't get the good stuff about the players. I mean, we get all that crap about who's doing steriods or who isn't, etc etc. but not what bars they're busting up or what dames they're running around with.

In my Golden Youth, that's what Bad Boys did. Like Sudden Sam McDowell. Every spring, the reporters would send back these stories about Sam from Tucson that you knew were about Sam being drunk in Tucson. I especially remember one about him being out in the desert with a handgun, allegedly trying to hunt those wild pigs they have out there. Wink wink--Sam got drunk and went shootin in the desert!

Then there were the Bo Belinsky stories. You had to love Bo. He had the hottest babes, top shelf liquor, flashy new clothes. Mediocre pitcher at best, but you didn't love him for his game. Hell, he was in the National League anyway, so why would we care?

Now Billy Martin was a different story. It was one thing for Mickey and Whitey to go out on the town, raise a little hell, grab some ass. But where Mick and Whitey were playful, Billy was an angry drunk. As much as he loved Billy, the Ol Perfesser had to trade him. Orders from above and so on. Can't have a mean street fightin banjo hitter out there getting the expensive boys in trouble.

But this was as bad as it got back then. There were no drugs to abuse. No steriods to take (or not take, no that was my wife taking those, not me). Dudes didn't get paid $10 million a year, so they didn't have lavish coke-infused lifestyles with dozens of hangers-on to suck them dry.The worst Mickey and Whitey had was Billy. And he got traded cuz he was just too bad for Mr. Topping's liking.

Gimme some love, Derek!

Good for Andy Pettitte! Barry Bonds, Pete Rose, Roger Clemens, take notice. If you fess up and apologize, you get a hug from everyone's All American, Derek Jeter. And you probably can continue to exist in your chosen field.

The question isn't should players use steriods, it's their body, who's hurt, etc.? The question is, If rich people who entertain us do something illegal, are they going to get busted? When you break a law that can affect the outcome of a baseball game, you have to pay for it if you get caught.

What the New England Patriots did in trying to steal signals is different. It is not against the laws of the U.S. Sure, that could affect a game's outcome. But no one will go to jail for doing it. It's a different situation when an individual breaks a law to get an unfair advantage.

But the way to avoid being creamed by the media and investigated for years is to come clean, apologize, and throw yourself into Derek Jeter's arms. Then you at least have a chance to repair your rep and continue to make millions on a baseball diamond.

The Splendid Splinter and The Rock

One of my very favorite arguments to tear apart is the "Ted Williams didn't really do that much for the Red Sox. After all, they only won one pennant while he was on the team." I just read an old Baseball Digest article that posited this theory. Fans will insist that a man who was arguably one of the top two or three hitters in the game's history had inflated stats because he played in Fenway; because guys like Bobby Doerr were on base to give him those gaudy RBI totals; that Ted was an indifferent fielder; that Ted wasn't a team player. Just before Rocky Colavito was traded, people were saying similar things about The Rock. It was bullshit in both cases.

Some players do benefit from home field advantage. Ted was one. But he still hit .328 on the road--and had more road homers in fewer at bats than at Fenway. Yes, he had people on base in front of him to drive in. but don't you think if the various managers that managed both players thought Doerr was the better run producer, one of them would have put Bobby behind Ted? C'mon, he was a great and powerful hitter. He got paid to drive in runs and he did that.

Was Ted an indifferent fielder? Maybe he just wasn't that good. You could make a long list of HOL outfielders who weren't. When you drive in 140 runs, you can let in 6 or 7 more a year than Willie Mays and still not hurt your team. And team player? Richie Allen was not a team player. And teams dumped him after a while, despite his talent. Ted may have thumbed his nose at fans and snubbed the press, but that doesn't mean he was a disruptive influence. Again, if you drive in between 113 and 159 runs in 9 seasons, you are ateam player, whether you go drinking with the boys after the game or not.

These are the kinds of arguments that get started when people react emotionally to a player they either like or don't like, and then try to find statistics to support their emotions. What I always loved about Bill James was that he, too, had his opinions. He reacted emotionally many times. But he didn't mix his opinions on a player's character with that player's stats.

Valentine's Day--My Funny Valentine cards

When I was a kid in the 1950s/early '60s, the months between the end of football season and the day the first fresh pack of Topps Baseball Cards arrived at Piersdorff's Drug Store in Fairview Park was a dreary time. No sports cards to collect. None of us cared about basketball cards. But in mid-to-late January, we got a whiff of relief. That's when the Funny Valentines cards would hit the shelves for just a few short weeks. I still have some; they're pretty battered, because we actually traded them around just for fun. Between those and Mad Magazine, my sense of humor was warped at an early age.

He doth Protesteth Too Much

OK, who out there thinks Roger Clemens used HGH? (A large show of hands.) Who thinks it was his WIFE who was using HGH? (His agent's hand is in the air, I see.) Rog is getting himself in a terrible jam, way down there in Texarkan. What is it about these modern athletes that they think it's OK to lie in front of Congress? I mean, unless you are a MEMBER of Congress, you really shouldn't do it.

Now who out there thinks Ol Rog is goin down? that's what I think too.